53.

The EOYs come up in a few weeks so I really am trying to abstain myself from further updating but the screechy piece of shit that is Singapore Idol has forced me to make this post detailing it's complete and utter failure at making me impressed.

Ch. 5 used to be a decent channel (only for imported shows mind you, not stupid crappy local sitcoms with the same predictable plot line again and again *rolleye*) to watch provided you didn't have cable or anything like that (if you did, then you are either retarded to continue watching local television or you have subscribed to the gardening channel) but now it's turned into a big huge lump of disgusting fail-manure with the recent airings of Singapore Idol.

Let's face it. When it comes to singing, Singapore just plain SUCKS at it. Honestly, which Singaporean singer (who can actually sing properly in English) has made it big on the global stage? And no, please don't give me silly nominations like Stefanie Sun (she does not sing English, or even if she did, it probably sucks) or JJ Lin (no darling, looking like a child on a sugar rush on stage does NOT equal talent).

Done thinking? Any one come to mind? I thought so.

And so this is why every year without fail I am constantly bemoaning the arrival of a new season of Singapore Idol. The talent is getting worse by the year (I still believe Taufik is better than Hady, although both of them honestly suck balls) and there is almost no reason why an audience would tune in, unless of course they are showing their foreign visitors how much local singers SUCK! (For those of you that honestly do watch this, I applaud your determination but severely doubt your sanity)

And yet time and time again we have a new season (SI is into it's 3rd iteration already) that is full of shitty singers who are nearly ALWAYS young teenage glory hunting attention whores. (Joakim Gomez? Yeah. I rest my case.)

Honestly the ONLY thing worth watching is the auditions, which is only because we are laughing AT the complete ineptitude of local people when it comes to singing. Then after that all we get is stupid garbage singing that shows absolutely NO improvement at all and ALWAYS comes down to a popularity contest anyway.

Take this season for example. The standard is APPALLING. The contestants are mainly made up of jobless fat people who lack the patience to look for a job and are just trying to get some fame. They aren't even good looking. And please, before you even cry out from your whiny fangirl/boy lungs in protest, please take into consideration that looking emo/goth (Hi guys look at me and my long fringe. Oh right, you CAN'T SEE MY EYES! lolololol so cool) + skinny jeans =/= good looking.

The contestants themselves aren't even likable and lack any personality at all. Oh but of course, you have your traditional sob stories as well. Take this Benjamin guy for example.

Boo hoo. I need a stick to walk on because my legs are hurt.

Firstly he is far too whiny and needs to learn how to shut up on set and he must realize that needing a stick to walk does not make you of any higher importance than the rest of us two-legged creatures. Shut up and sing. Oh no wait, you can't do that either, so why not just shut up and stay shut?

Then we have this boy Duane who I personally cannot stand at all because half the time he is crying in a little corner like a little baby just because he is fat and ugly and wants to prove himself to the world. I wish the judges hadn't let him in actually. He cries more than it rains in Singapore nowadays. And trust me, it rains. A LOT.

Don't even get me started on the hosts. Hady is a boring extra who's probably just their to encourage the contestants by repeating the line "If I can win this, you can too!" ad nauseam. Mean while Gurmit attempts to be funny and charismatic and he fails tremendously. Seriously dude, go back to scripted comedies. They aren't really funny at all but you look a lot more natural doing that. And no, you cannot be Ryan Seacrest.

I pity the judges for having to sift through such crap talent. Although they are not without their faults too. Florence is transforming into a far less entertaining Paula Abdul while Ken is attempting to be strict but the way he positions his glasses on his nose bridge makes him look like a lecherous old man in a hawker centre.

Dick is well... a dick to contestants, which is actually a compliment to him because some contestants you feel, are so disillusioned that you just NEED to shout in their faces that they should get vocal chord implants and/or shut up for life.

Why is it that American Idol has so much talent? Why is that people who can't even make it past their first rounds are often better than some of our finalists? Why is it that even people on YouTube sing far better than our crappy karaoke singers?

(No, please don't bring up the "America has more people" argument. Sweden has just over 9 million people [twice of ours] and has produced the likes of ABBA, which by the way is roughly 23089569068694376043 times more successful than the total number of local singers combined)

Let's face it, Singapore is never meant to be a country with vast amounts of singing talent and the only reason Singapore Idol is still on going is because the producers make money from the idiots that still watch it.

Peace out/Bring on the hate.